May 2013 be for you what 2012 was for...

Adele, Jade Jones, Ben Affleck, Usain Bolt, Lena Dunham, the San Francisco Giants, the New York Giants, Claire Danes, Barack Obama, Miguel Cabrera, Mike Nicholls, Michael Phelps, Jermaine Paul, Aaron Paul, E.L. James, Octavia Spencer, Bon Iver, RANGO, Judy Kaye, Alabama Crimson Tide, THE ARTIST, Meryl Streep, Jon Cryer, Jon Stewart, Mike Trout, Umami burgers, MODERN FAMILY, Dario Franchitti ,

LA is a great town when there's nobody here

The best week of the year in Los Angeles is always this one, the final seven days of the year. More property taxes and obligations are on tap for me in January, but here in the waning days of December I can bask in the glory of the city that Zorro once called home.

First of all, the town is practically empty. Most people from the industry are gone, terrorizing the help in Hawaii and Aspen

Stuff they don't buy on SHARK TANK

SHARK TANK has become a guilty pleasure.  Enterprising people trying to interest billionaires into investing in their new miracle products or inventions.  Most are ridiculous.  You think -- they can't be serious.  Who would buy this crap?  But then I get on an airplane and open the SKY MALL magazine.  That's who buys it.  And the prices are goofier than the items.   Here are some of the

The road to Hana

Here are some great photos on the road to Hana and other assorted Maui locales taken by my son Matt.  He has the kind of camera that's just a camera and you can't make phone calls on it.  I didn't know they still made those.  Anyway, take a look.  And check out his website for more and even better photos.  

HOMELAND for the holidays

Last Friday Questions of the year.  I hope I do them justice.

Brian starts us off:

Ken - what do you think of Homeland and The Last Resort? I heard that Homeland was renewed up for another season, but that Last Resort was cancelled.

I love HOMELAND. Absolutely riveting television. And Claire Danes & Damian Lewis are extraordinary together. That’s not a surprise. What is is Mandy

Engineers in paradise

Here's Part 2 of my recent Maui travelogue.  Part 1 was yesterday.

After a week of exploring the wonders of the island and exchanging rental cars, daughter Annie and her friend Jon arrived followed shortly by son Matt and his wife Kim. Suddenly our little condo became the stateroom scene in NIGHT AT THE OPERA. So Debby and I took exile at the Grand Wailea resort.

There was a swimming pool

the house of sand and vog

Hope you had a great Christmas.  As my longtime readers know, whenever I venture out of town I return with a travelogue and rental car horror stories.  Here's my latest:

Aloha! Back from another three weeks in paradise – our annual jaunt to the magic island of Maui to pay tribute to the Gods and apologize for Walmarts. My wife and I again rented a condo and the various kids/significant

My favorite funny foto of the year

Those who know me and my affection for the '60s and Bob's Big Boy will especially appreciate this alternate version of the classic reveal in the original PLANET OF THE APES. 

A Mommy Dearest Christmas

May your family have as wonderful a Christmas as Joan Crawford's.


MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

My Christmas card next year

R.I.P. Jack Klugman

Sorry to hear of the passing of Jack Klugman.  He was 90.  You may remember him as either Oscar Madison or Quincy M.E.  For years before that he was a character actor.  My favorite role of his was as the father in the movie GOODBYE COLUMBUS.  He had the rare ability to be hilariously funny one minute and then heartbreaking the next.  And he was always real.  Lines never felt "written" when he

All about (Christmas) Eve

You would think that being Jewish on Christmas Eve I would feel left out. Actually I love Christmas Eve. Here are two reasons why:

The first is an excerpt from my book, THE ME GENERATION… BY ME (GROWING UP IN THE ‘60s) – the perfect last minute gift.



On Christmas Eve, (my brother) Corey and I went to Disneyland. This is a secret only Jews know: Disneyland is empty on Christmas Eve.

Full confession

I have a good friend who, back in the ‘90s, used to work for SPORTS ILLUSTRATED. Every holiday season he would send me an SI holiday gift box. Inside would be handsome coffee table books of golf tournaments and classic World Series and also an engagement calendar. This is a handsome desk calendar broken down into weeks with photos of swimsuit models accompanying each week.

So I began

Dear Santa: All I want is a Fizz-Nik

What’s
the dumbest holiday gift you’ve ever received? Mine was a Fizz-nik.
And understand, I really WANTED this thing. In my dumb kid-ness I
thought this was the coolest invention EVER.It was a plastic
straw with a big bubble in the middle. This was actually two half
spheres that twisted together with straws on either end. You put a
scoop of ice cream in the bubble and twisted it

A Christmas show by Matthew Weiner & me

Here's a BECKER Christmas episode, written by Matthew Weiner (creator of MAD MEN) and directed by me.  I wonder -- whatever happened to Matt?  For that matter, whatever happened to me?

Merry Christmas

Judge Judy, NFL stars, and other actors

Back in LA, ready with Friday Questions.

Cap'n Bob begins:

Do non-actors like Judge Judy need to be in an actor's union? How about non-actors who make one-shot appearances on TV shows?

You can be Taft-Hartley’ed if you just do one, but anything more you need to join SAG.

Interestingly, when I had to join SAG about twenty-five years ago, I had to go right down to their office, fill out the

The scam of the century... or at least bicentennial

Yesterday I talked about about my days teaching radio at the KIIS Broadcasting Workshop. This was during that period where my writing partner, David Isaacs and I were churning out spec scripts and getting rejected by RHODA every other week.

The school was somewhat shady. I mean, what is there to teach really? This is how you announce the time? Seven ways to turn off your mic? But I did

Before I was a writer...

So when I got fired from KSEA a week before Christmas (see yesterday's post), that's when I decided to give up radio and pursue writing. 

Like all starving writers, when I was banging out specs trying to break in I had a crummy job. All I cared about were the hours. I had to be free at night to work with my partner, David Isaacs on our scripts. As long as I made enough money to pay the

The Christmas I got fired

One
of the many reasons I became a writer is that I got tired of being
fired as a disc jockey. Today marks the 38th anniversary of the last
time I signed off my show with “see you tomorrow” and was never heard from again.   This is a blog tradition:  the anniversary of the Christmas I was fired. 
1974, I’m Beaver Cleaver on KSEA, San Diego, playing “The Night Chicago
Died” and “Billy

Okay, so who REALLY REALLY created BEWITCHED

Lots of comments Friday about my post on who created BEWITCHED. A number of you suggested real credit should go to the screenwriters of the 1942 movie I MARRIED A WITCH. With all due respect to those writers – Robert Pirosh, Marc Connelly, Norman Matson, Rene Clair, Andre Rigaud, Dalton Trumbo and Thorne Smith (whose story the movie was based on) – they may have tread on similar territory

My Xmas movies recommendations

A CHRISTMAS STORY is my all-time favorite holiday movie.
I’ve seen it probably fifty times, but I don’t think I’ve ever
actually watched it from the beginning to end in one sitting. Like most
people, I catch the annual 24-hour marathon on TNT or TBS or one of
those networks with a “T” and see various segments at a time. Usually,
by the end of 24-hours I’ve pretty much seen the whole

A personal plea from Batman

Hi kids, this is Batman, the old Caped Crusader.  Y'know, the '60s was a glorious era.  I could still fit into my suit, Robin and I could hang out together without those rumors spreading, and even though the Batmobile got two miles a gallon, gas was still cheap enough that I could still afford Alfred.



I'm here today to tell you fans of a great new book about the '60s I just discovered -- THE

When not to take down your Xmas decorations

This
is my friend Kevin’s house in the residential San Fernando Valley.
He’s Jewish but loves to celebrate the colors and lights of the season.
This tradition began (as most things do) because his girlfriend at the
time really loved Christmas decorations.

There’s not another house on his block even remotely as elaborate. I bet you can see Kevin's house from space.

Now
the question

Who really created BEWITCHED?

Aloha from Hawaii where the tradewinds are whispering Friday Questions:

Derrick starts us off:

How is it decided who gets credit for creating a series? I was reading a piece about the old sitcom Bewitched awhile back, and while a gentleman named Sol Saks is credited in every episode as creator of the series, I got the impression from the article that nearly half of the guys associated

Another one of my rants

Hollywood motion pictures are designed for young audiences. 18-34 is the only demographic the industry believes still goes to the movies. So they churn out big budget comic book films, franchises, raunchy comedies, animation, and adaptations of board games. Any movie targeted for someone older than the Mario Brothers is banished to an art theater. There it plays alongside HITLER VS. STALIN

The best book on improv comedy

... is now available.  IMPROV COMEDY by Andy Goldberg is once again in print.  You can get the paperback version here. 

Of all the books on improv comedy, this is the best.  I recommend it for all actors interested in comedy and writers who want to develop or sharpen their comedic skills. 

Improvisational comedy is a terrific tool, a great deal of fun, and since SNL will probably be around

My Kim Basinger metaphor

Ever see the Bruce Willis movie BLIND DATE? It’s from so long ago he still had hair. In this very funny film (written by Dale Laudner) Bruce accepts a blind date with Kim Bassinger. But she comes with a warning: if she gets drunk she becomes bat shit crazy. Still, it’s the 1987 Kim Basinger so warning be damned! What happens of course is that she does get plastered and hilarity ensues.

The worst agent sales pitch EVER

Here’s another Hollywood agent story. I told one recently, and they are always crowd pleasers.   This is one of my personal favorites. 

It’s 1982. My writing partner, David and I are at William Morris. Several years prior we signed on with a young agent at a small tenpercentery (I love that expression), and as she moved on to bigger and better agencies we followed her. She and we were

Do rewrites always make shows better?

As kind of a fun experiment, Earl Pomerantz, over on his fine blog, and I are both going to write today on the same topic – whether rewrites really improve a project. In our particular field – a half-hour sitcom.

The first script my partner, David Isaacs and I ever sold was for THE JEFFERSONS. We were told going in that the staff routinely did a lot of rewriting. We didn’t care. We were

Decoding Hollywoodspeak

Most
of the real creativity in Hollywood goes into positive spin. Here are
some industry expressions and what they really mean:

“Hospitalized because the actor was simply feeling dizzy due to a medication he was taking for an ear infection” – drunk

“Hiatus” – cancelled

“Good Exit Numbers” – DOA at the boxoffice

“Highly qualified” – knows somebody

“They’re still good friends” – the ugly

A handy writing tip

Just saw one of my favorite DICK VAN DYKE SHOW episodes, “100 Terrible Hours”. It’s the one where Rob was a disc jockey and had to stay on the air for 100 straight hours just before interviewing with Alan Brady for a writing job. I love that episode for many reasons but first and foremost is the structure. I imagine Carl Reiner and the staff thought it would be fun to see Rob’s initial

Happy Hanukah bitches

Tonight is the first night. Thought I'd show you something traditional to get you in the mood.

R.I.P. Reinhold Weege

So sorry to hear of the passing of Reinhold Weege.  He wrote for BARNEY MILLER, MASH, and created NIGHT COURT.  Very funny writer and lovely guy.  He was only 63.  Because he's been retired for some time (back then you made big money for creating a hit show) he's not as well-known as he should be.   But trust me, among writers of my generation, he was greatly admired.   The world of comedy is a

Friday Questions

It’s always extra poignant being in Hawaii during Pearl Harbor Day. As the “Day of Infamy” gets further into the mist, take a moment to remember and give thanks. 

Now then – Friday Questions.

Stephen asks:

Joss Whedon tells writers, "Cut what you love", the idea being that when a story runs into trouble, be willing to remove your favorite scene for the good of the piece as a whole. Do you

KILLER KARAOKE -- amusing or the Apocalypse?

As you know I like to surf my channel guide in search of the worst, cheesiest, most appalling reality shows on television. The more insipid, the more ill-conceived, the more Hugh Hefner the better. From PREGNANT IN HEELS hosted by Rosie, a woman who can’t talk to Paris Hilton & Nicole Richie giving enemas to participants of a fat camp – I scour the globe hunting down these atrocities.

Casting against type

But first a word from our sponsor -- me.  For the holidays I have just reduced the price of my book, THE ME GENERATION... BY ME.   Paperback was $14.99, now just $12.10.  Kindle version was $6.99, now only $4.99.   



It's the perfect gift, especially for someone who's a baby boomer (like your parents)or can read, and it's a great way to support this blog.  Also, put it on your wish list and

SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK: My review

David O. Russell is one of those filmmakers who is capable of making an extraordinary movie or a giant piece of shit. You wonder how the same guy could make FLIRTING WITH DISASTER, THE FIGHTER, and also I HEART HUCKABEES. He’s one of those artistes who thinks a lot of himself. I saw him at a Q & A at the DGA after HUCKABEES screened and let’s just say Orson Welles was more humble. (

Oscar campaigns

We have officially entered Oscar season. This is the time of year Harvey Weinstein, Steven Spielberg, and Will Smith live for. Studios will spend big bucks on campaigns – all designed to cop those coveted Oscar nominations. You'll see posters, full-page ads, DVD’s, private screenings, and appearances. Hell, if you’re an Academy member Steven Spielberg will come to your house personally and

How to recognize a bad sitcom

Charlie Hauck is a terrific comedy writer (FRASIER, MAUDE, etc.) and a hilarious author. His
comic novel about a writing team launching a sitcom starring the diva
from hell is both hilarious and all-too-real. The book is called
ARTISTIC DIFFERENCES and well worth reading.

On one page he explains how you can tell a bad sitcom. Simple rules, worth repeating here.

1. Any show in which any

The CHEERS script that could have ruined us

Happily, there's no writers strike this year (it being leap year).  One
byproduct of a writers strike is that studios may shoot existing
scripts but may not change them. So jokes can’t be fixed, lines can’t
be tailored to actors, locations can’t be changed (too bad if an
exterior gets rained out – you can’t move inside to a new location), and
special effects have to be executed just as